Christmas 2016

December 25, 2016

As I lay here on Christmas morning, I’m tempted to think of a million reasons why this was the worst Christmas ever. Of how broken parts of my family really are. To allow the tears that I’ve had the last few days take over this morning. Instead, I’m reminded of all of the good times I’ve experienced between this chaotic weekend. I was able to share some close moments with my family we were able to bond over things that ideally you wouldn’t want to bond over but I’m forever grateful for that bond. 

In the midst of chaos I’m reminded of those who really are in my corner, who really love me! I’m grateful for such a solid crew. I’m grateful for things finally coming to the light and being able to move forward in a positive direction from the experiences of the weekend. I’m reminded of my grandmothers motto “Live and let live” as I’ve tried to adopt it as my own I realize that it may be just a little bit harder to live by this than I thought. 

I’m grateful for the growth taken place in me because for this weekend I am able to have this motto rooted deeper in me, which ultimately pulls me closer to her. Which brings me back to stronger bonds being built between family. Man grandma, how I wish I was able to talk to you and ask your advice during these moments. Instead I’m trusting that you’ve instilled enough in me to make it on my own thinking what you’d do in this situation. 

Lastnight I made a caption “what a Christmas” and in that moment my heart was extremely heavy but at this moment I feel anew. Although I still feel pain I’m going to hold on to the fact that God has kept the entire family the entire weekend AND the growth I’ve experienced is going to be something that helps me for a lifetime. 

 Merry Christmas friends and family, I love you all!